The Office Hires a Veteran
by texasPanzer
Summary: Taking place during the 5th Season the company hires a Veteran as part of a tax break, however, Michael seems to think that the new guy is a ticking time bomb as the others don't believe him.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters to The Office. They are owned by MSNBC. This story takes place during the 5th Season so Erin is working reception and Toby is still with HR, but well versed viewers will notice that it is very mixed. I may not be well versed as I think I am but if I make an error, please point it out and I will correct. Lines in italics are talking head interviews. Thank you for reading. Enjoy.

Dunder-Mifflin Paper Company was a small, not relatively well known, office supplier in Scranton, Pennsylvania. The workers there were primarily 'nine-five punch in and out' and gone for the weekends, but as a group they were very diverse; there married and single-religious and agnostic, the life of the party and the quiet and subdued, the loved and reviled. What is enough to add more to the mix?

Playing on his computer in his personal office Regional Manager Michael Scott didn't hear his phone go off for a couple rings as he was sucked into an intense game of Chef World on Facebook, but picking it up there was Erin, the receptionist, on the other end saying that there was an important call from corporate CFO David Wallace. Punching the button for the line Michael kept his eyes on the screen, one hand on his mouse as he began, "Hey, buddy. How's the Big Apple?"

"Michael" Wallace's voice was a bit low and seemed annoyed. He had dealt with Michael numerous times for his incompetent handling of the branch and his seemingly oblivious demeanor. He wanted this call over with as quickly as possible, "Michael, did you receive the email that was sent out to you last week over the new employees?"

Michael was not responding, he was trying to find a place to put his fresh chocolate cake, "Michael? Michael!" Wallace called out that made Michael jump a bit.

"Easy, David. The city life is making you angry. Tends to happen to city folk. Why don't you move out into the country…."

Before he could go on Wallace cut him off, "Michael, Corporate sent out emails to the other branches about the hiring of veterans. All of the other branches responded back except for you. Is there a problem?"

"No. No. No problem at all, David. Just trying to-" as he spoke Michael closed the game and went to his email and entered the passcode that was printed on a sticky note on the left side of the monitor-and pulled up over fifty unopened email messages and went through each one trying to find the one in question.

"You didn't read it, did you?" Wallace sighed in frustration.

"No." Michael said at first, and then whispered, "Yeah…."

"Michael, listen to me carefully. The company is now part of the Hire a Veteran Campaign. We get a tax break for hiring veterans so I sent out emails to the branches to start doing so. Your branch is the only one that hasn't responded. Now, we went through the applications and there was only one veteran that applied to your branch, but you didn't send anything about hiring him. Is there a problem?"

"No. no problem at all, David."

"Good. Well. Because of your delays we went ahead and hired him. His name is Charles McMillan. He lives in Scranton and he'll be coming in tomorrow and working with corporate as an administrator." However, as Wallace continued to talk Michael was slowly losing interest. He didn't like corporate people. There was Toby of Human Resources that was his bane and that was his only enemy in this office, but apparently now they were going to have a second man and this had Michael worried.

As Michael was sitting and stewing in his office Pam enters the office with a beaming smile on her face as she puts her coat on the rack beside her reception desk crosses over to a desk adjacent to Jim's desk and sits down putting her purse down by her feet.

_Pam: (sitting in the conference room still with a beaming smile on her face) we're engaged and we need the extra money. So, Jim actually got me into contact with a local publisher that needed readers. So, I became a professional reader! I do mostly short stories and poems, mark mistakes and all that and give my honest opinion before sending them back and it's anonymous. I don't get paid very much, it's on commission but they do start to add up!_

As she sits behind her desk and turns her computer on she takes a folder, places it before her, opens it and starts reading as Jim enters the office, hangs up his coat and gloves to the edge of the desk and looks down. "Whatcha reading?"

Looking up at him and smiling Pam replies, "Oh this one is about a little bird that is trying to rescue his friends that are trapped in a bird cage inside an old woman's home!" speaking as though she is really interested in reading it further. "I'm only on the tenth page but this author is really good!"

Jim smiles and nods, "Is it any better than the wizard that eats a whole bunch of strange leaves?"

Pam could only help but giggle and go back to reading as Jim goes to his desk, sits down, and turns on his computer. Already next to him was his office mate Dwight whom was combing through his daily emails and then pulls up those that go to Michael Scott as he knows the password and when he sees that there is a new employee coming, a veteran, Dwight immediately gets up and goes to Michael's office, barging in without knocking and sits right beside his boss, "Michael, what is going on? Are we getting a new employee?"

"Yes, Dwight, we are," Michael replied with a bit of worry, "This guy is going to be from corporate…"

"Corporate?" Dwight replies, "Why corporate? Why do they need to send someone out here?"

"I don't know, Dwight," Michael shrugs his shoulders as he leans back in his seat and folds his arms before his chest.

Immediately Dwight kindled an idea, "A spy?"

"A what?"

"A spy" Dwight turns to him and says, "They're going to try and plant a spy in our ranks to send to corporate all of our dirty little secrets." When he spoke Dwight actually meant every word of what he was saying.

"We're not dirty," Michael sighs, "Oscar keeps this place clean. But, tell you what, you're good at surveillance, right?"

"The best" Dwight replies confidently.

"Well, see what you can find on this new guy coming in. Corporate says he's a veteran and I think that he may be trouble for us. So find out what you can on him and let's start from there."

"On it!" Dwight leaps up and goes to his desk. On the way Michael calls him back.

"Here, let me give you my email password…" Michael began.

"I already got it" Dwight replies, shutting the door.

For the rest of the day Dwight was combing through pages of information on the internet of this Charles McMillan. He was even able to get a report from the Army using the Freedom of Information Act, but it was very brief statement. He found that there was a Charles McMillan that was Honorably Discharged from the Army in 2005 after eight years of service and was awarded a Silver Star, two Bronze Stars with V device and a Purple Heart, but what he couldn't 't figure out was why Charles was being sent here for all places and that was most pressing.

By about lunch time Jim, who was pulled in with so many client calls, was finally given a lull and asked Dwight what he was up to, but the man with the glasses and Dijon mustard shirt replied that what he was doing was top secret, so Jim just nodded and went to the kitchen to get his ham and cheese sandwich from the fridge and retired to the break room to eat. As he was eating Dwight comes in with a thick stack of paper wrapped in a Manilla enevelope and drops it on the small table across from Jim deliberately so the loud crack of impact gets his attention before sitting down.

"What's up, Dwight?" Jim asks casually.

"Jim, if I tell you this, will you keep it top secret? Do you want to join me on a plan to protect our branch?"

The bored Jim immediately sensed leaned forward in his seat and propping up his upper body on his elbows Jim whispers, "Absolutely I do."

_Jim: Dwight says that there's a new guy coming in from corporate and he and Michael think that this guy is going to be a danger to us and so Dwight is planning on trying to get as much information out of this guy as possible and try to expose him as a spy and he asked for my help (his lips pull to the side in a mocking expression) I will try to help Dwight as best as I can. (he gives the camera a thin smile and slightly tilts his head to one side, again mocking.)_

The next day Erin was sitting at her desk, getting it going to receive calls when a new figure came in carrying a small box tucked under his left arm and a backpack on his shoulders. She knew a new person was coming but wasn't told who so when she saw this person she smiled and said, "Hi, can I help you?"

The person paused before her desk, "Yes, I'm Charles. I was just hired…" before he could finish Dwight immediately stood up, went around Jim and stood before Charles.

"I'm Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager," holding out his right hand. He was going to be testing this man right from the start.

_Dwight: I'm going to be testing this man. One of the ways is by his handshake. If the man has a weak handshake, doesn't look you in the eye, doesn't know what to say when asked multiple questions and backs up when you speak to him then he is a man with low standards. (He then smiles devilishly sensing that he is going to be winning)_

When he stands before Charles, Dwight easily dwarfed the man standing at 6'2 and Charles was only at 5'11 and immediately steps in close and tries leaning forward for the handshake much to his surprise Charles didn't flinch in shaking his hand and didn't even back up but looked up and Dwight and looked into his green eyes, "Charles McMillan."

_Dwight: (pauses for a moment and begrudgingly admits) Not a bad start._

Michael comes out of his office and is all smiles as he shakes Charles' hand. "Hi, I'm Michael Scott-the manager" then claps his hands several times loudly to get everyone's attention. "People I would like you all to meet Charles. He's going to be joining us. He is from _corporate_." Emphasizing the corporate part so he could tell people that he was the enemy. Turning to Charles he said, "Why don't you tell us a little about yourself?"

Looking at Michael then at the other eyes at the desks arrayed before him and off to the right-Kevin had to stand up and look around Oscars' desk and Angela's eyes were just above the cubicle wall that separated her desk from Erin's. "Well, I'm Charles, as you know. I'm just a guy from corporate and a program manager. The company is trying to launch new software for all the branches that is supposed to stream line sales and reduce costs, but…" then shrugs his shoulders.

"You were in the army?" Dwight asks. He already knew the answer but he wanted to get the exposure started.

Looking at him Charles sighed, "Yes, I was in the Army."

"We're you deployed?" Dwight asks again.

"Yes, I was deployed during Iraqi Freedom. I did two tours there. Thirty months."

Phyllis smiles, "Thank you for your service."

"No problem" Charles gives a half smile and nods to her.

"Did you kill anybody?" Dwight asks next rather coldly.

"Dwight!" Pam exclaims in surprise.

Instead of answering Charles takes back his box, "I like to get started."

"Good. Well, we can put you in the annex" Dwight began, but then Jim stopped them.

"Hold on," Jim said, "There's that old desk over there by Stanley" pointing in the far corner of the office near Creed. There was no one there. In fact, there was no Creed either and his phone was ringing.

Dwight sighs and says they could put Charles there and as they go Jim trades a look with Pam of concern. Knowing that Dwight will either try to scare this man away or force him to submit Jim was going to try and help this man to at least stay afloat in this company. What came next was a series of introductions with Dwight taking Charles from station to station, meeting everyone. Starting with Phyllis, Stanley, and Andy. Dwight tried to just brush past them with just giving names and moving on, but Andy jumped up to shake the man's hand, "Hi. Name's Andy Bernand. People call me Nard-Dog. (Dropping his tone) You can call me that. Do people give you a nickname?"

"Not in a while" Charles replied.

"Well then" Andy smiles, "Allow me to be the first to give you one here for you!" then looks Charles over. He wore khaki slacks and brown tennis shoes and a maroon button up shirt. Not exactly formal but Andy didn't call him out on it. There was his bristling hair, smooth facial cheeks, dark brown eyes, and thin lips but there was nothing sticking out that Andy could use to make a nice sounding nick name. "What did you do in the Army? If you don't mind me asking."

"Combat Engineer. Explosives"

"Well!" Andy exclaims, "I got the right one; Boom-Boom!"

Charles chuckles and nods.

"Boom-Boom it is!" Andy claps Charles' back. "Look out everyone! Here comes Boom-Boom!" At her desk Erin was smiling and nodding with this.

Going on to Jim he was on a sale's call and was distracted, but Pam was also eager to meet the new guy until her phone rang as well, so it was cut short. Creed was not at his desk and Meredith was also on the phone and when Dwight came near she snarled at him to get away. At the accounting department Charles turned in his paper work so he could start getting paid to Angela, and Kevin also showed Charles his stash of M&Ms. "If you want some, just let me know." Oscar was trying to get through the paperwork to close out the quarter so he didn't talk much, but they did shake hands before Dwight continued on towards Erin the receptionist who was very eager to meet new people. When Dwight came by he said, "Erin-receptionist" and turned sharply to the annex expecting Charles to follow. He was all the way to the door before he realized that Charles was still at Erin's desk and marched back perturbed.

Erin asked, "Hey, do you think I can get some of that Army food? I've always wanted to try that?"

"You mean MREs? Sure. What do you like?"

"Anything will be fine" she nodded.

"Sure. I'll get some during lunch"

"I can pay" she replied going for her purse but Charles held up a hand.

"It's okay. I got tons of them. I can spare one," Charles gave a half smile and shrugged his shoulders.

Continuing on Dwight led the way to the annex for the final leg of the journey; Toby and Kelly with the intention of just blowing them off, however when Toby turns around in his seat when they entered he showed that he already had the necessary books out for an introduction and Charles defied Dwight's 'We're done here' and sits down with Toby to listen to him, much to both Toby's and Dwight's surprise.

As it neared lunch time Phyllis and Stanley had finally finished a deal with two local clients and after typing out the paperwork and sending it down to the warehouse who they packaged and set out the products, but because the orders were only a few boxes they were not going to use their truck to deliver so Charles was asked to do it and Charles went for it because he could take them out quickly and spend the rest of the time out for lunch and grab the MRE. As the new guy disappeared into the warehouse Michael cautiously comes out of his office and looks around. Not seeing Charles at his desk he wanders over to Dwight, "Where's the new guy?" whispering.

Overhearing this Phyllis turns around in his seat and says, "He's delivering a couple orders for us."

Keeping his eyes on Dwight Michael next asked, "What else has he been doing?" reaching into his breast pocket Dwight takes to a small note pad with all of his information written on it, "Came in a 8:58 a.m and was introduced to everyone in the office. At 9:10 was introduced to Toby of HR. At 9:30 he submitted his paperwork to Angela of accounting. 9:31 sat down at his desk for the first time…" Michael waves his hand before him to get Dwight to stop.

"That's not what I meant. What I meant was-has he been 'normal'?"

Unable to avoid overhearing this from his seat Jim, who had his left arm bent, elbow resting on his desk in a rather bored position, the hand holding up his head, leans slightly further onto it.

Curious Dwight blinks as he pockets his notepad, "What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean, guys like that are known to be unstable…" Michael began and still whispering.

"Whoa, Michael, what are you talking about?" Jim says knowing where Michael was going in his train of thought and wanting to put a stop to it.

"Charles is a veteran and veterans, you know, will be unstable, like a time bomb waiting to go off."

"Michael, where did you get that from?" Jim asked.

Again, Michael waved his hand, this time at Jim. He was thoroughly convinced that Charles was going to pop.

"Dwight, I got an idea. Come with me" Michael says turning about and running back into his office with his college right behind him and shutting the door.

Turning about and looking at Pam all Jim could do was shrug his shoulders and Pam felt a cold shiver run up her spine knowing that something bad was going to happen.

When it was lunch time Pam and Jim sat in the break room area with the vending machines eating their sandwiches, chatting about Pam's stories. Kevin was there with them feasting on a box of cookies. Though the first two knew that Dwight and Michael were up to something they became more focused on Pam's readings as she was liking the story and was planning on giving a raving review saying "This writer has a lot of talent" but in order to avoid any bias as this was a local company and the submitters and reviews may know one another, Pam was not told the writer's name, but Jim was curious to know if Pam would ever finish her own stories as she has to keep putting them off because of work.

At the same time Dwight was using Michael's computer and goes onto the internet with the intent was to help Charles with his 'problems' and find a cure. Pulling up therapy Dwight points out, "There are a number of psychologists and physiatrists in the area but they're not covered in the company's HMO," but that's not what Michael was looking for.

Sitting next to him in his chair Michael sighed, "No. No. Not that. I need 'types of therapy', you know. Ways that we help _cure_ the man ourselves."

"Okay" Dwight nodded and tapped some more words on the search engine and hit enter. "Here we go. 'Types of therapy'. There's 'shock therapy'…"

Michael shook his head and hissed, "We're not going to zap him with electricity, Dwight. We don't want to kill him."

"I can get rid of the body easily" Dwight replied unbuckling his eyebrows.

"No! Dwight. I want to 'cure' this man. If we can cure him of this he will look upon me as a savior. That's what I want...I want him to look up at me with ravenous _(mistaking the word 'reverence')_ and respect. In order to that we have to cure him."

"What exactly are we going to be 'curing him' of?" Dwight asks as he draws from his brief experience he was not able to find any physical problems with the man.

"Dwight," Michael sighs as he crosses his arms and looks up, "This man maybe sick. He may be deranged. He may be a killer in hiding..."

"You mean he's CIA?" Dwight looks at him with slightly widening eyes.

"No. Nothing like that. I mean, he may be suffering from Post Partum Depression."

It took a moment for Dwight to figure out what he was getting on to, "You mean PTSD-Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? Because those are two different things..."

"I believe it is" Michael replies but doesn't really answer the question but remains firm in his belief that he wants to help Charles over a disease he thinks he has. "Anyway. Types of therapy that we can do" leaning forward in his seat and goes through the list that Dwight has found.

It's noon now and the office is at lunch. Charles is still out and most of the others are in the break room eating except for Dwight and Michael whom are in the latter's office. Sitting behind his desk Michael has taken off his thin white striped black jacket and his dark tie but remained in his white button up shirt. _"I had Dwight go and get the necessary materials. When Charles comes back we are going to put him on the right path"_ speaking a smile. In his mind what he was planning on doing was right. It wasn't like one of Jim's pranks to get back at Dwight or something twisted. In his child like mind Michael believed that he could actually help a man who didn't appear to be in need of help. As he says that Dwight comes into the office with a small face paint kit, a brush and a duffel bag. "Okay, Michael, let's get to work." Taking out a large white towel he wraps around Michael's neck like a bib and opens the make up kit and begins dabbing the brush into it.

_"This is going to work"_ Michael says confidently as he closes his eyes and leans back.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters to The Office. They are owned by MSNBC. This story takes place during the 5th Season and is an alternative take on the episode "Stress Relief". Thank you for reading. Enjoy and post a review.

Inside Michael's office Dwight had closed the door and the blinds, waiting for the moment when Charles would be coming back from lunch so they could carry out their therapy. Sitting at her desk Erin was eagerly holding onto her cellphone.

_Erin: Michael said that this was going to be like an episode of 'Scare Tactics'. I've never seen the show but I wanted to get in on it because I wanted to post the video onto YouTube so I can get a hundred views and where I sit is going to be the perfect spot to see his face when Dwight and Michael come out._

By 1 o'clock with lunch done the rest of the office workers began to filter out from the break room back to their desks, still oblivious of a plan that was already in motion. Sitting down Jim woke up his computer and picked up the phone as Pam sat down next to him and flicked her eyes up to see Dwight not as his desk. "Where's Dwight?" she asked slowly turning her head left and right to try and find him. It was curious that he was not at his desk as he was always prompt but Jim merely shrugged his shoulders. After a couple of minutes Pam was on a call and wasn't looking when Dwight emerged from Michael's office. In one hand was a small, heavy, bag. Closing the door behind him he silently, intently, walked towards the kitchen, moving around Andy and Stanley with being witnessed.

_Dwight: (whispering out in the hallway next to the annex) Michael has a plan going to help Charles with his problems and I'm eager to do my part. As Safety Office I'm responsible for everyone's' safety at the office. Last time I tried to do a lesson using Power Point, but no one was paying attention. Power Point is boring. As Michael is waiting for him to get back I'm going to help the rest of the office to a desperate situation. (he holds up his bag before going around to different parts of the office setting everything up where he conducts a voice over) This office is weak. There are people who don't pay attention, who don't take anything seriously. What I'm going to do is put things in motion and see what happens and later will show them their mistakes. When people are cornered they tend to think faster and aggressively. The 'flight or fight' mentality. Mine is always to fight but everyone else is 'flight'. It's time for a change. __A few minutes was all he needed to set everything up._

The front door opened and Charles came in, one hand held the aloft a tan colored thick plastic container of a unopened MRE; bean burrito. Coming up to Erin's desk he placed it in front of her, "Here you go" with a thin smile.

Erin rose up and eagerly took it. "This is so awesome" she replied feeling the surprisingly heavy weight in one hand and keeping her phone in the other hand and keeping it down low so it would remain out of sight. "Thank you!" she really liked the new guy and this gift was very surprising that she was now regretting getting in on this gag. So much so that her mind lapsed, she forgot what her purpose was allowing Charles to go back to his desk before he started patting his pockets. He had forgotten his wallet inside his vehicle. Mumbling a bit he decides to go out and get it just so he knows where it is, being protective of his cards and pictures. As Erin sees him leaving she tries to say something to stop him but her moving mouth emits nothing as she was now conflicted. Seeing her mouthing something he shrugs his shoulders, "Forgot my wallet. I'll be right back" and tries to open the front door but it wouldn't budge. Tugging on the door after turning the handle and the lock he began looking at the frame and sees something sticking out at his feet. It takes several pulls but he succeeds in freeing a wood wedge. Holding it up as he turned about he asks Erin, "What's this?"

"Oh, that's the door stop," she nervously laughs, "It must've gotten stuck. It happens," innocently shrugging her shoulders.

Dropping the wedge beside the potted plant Charles thought nothing of it and leaves. Erin rises up and tries to look for Dwight, but he's nowhere to be seen and now she becomes overwhelmed with dread that the joke will fail horribly. The rest of the workers continued on oblivious; tapping on their computers, calculators, looking at numbers, countless numbers except for Creed who is playing solitaire and dropping mung bean sprouts into his mouth and Meredith playing Klondike.

Dwight came back and darted in Michael's office, closing the door behind him before Erin could report this dire change leaving the receptionist to sit nervously in her chair. What she didn't know was that Dwight had jammed other doors to try and trap everyone inside the office and used a blow torch on some of the doors to heat them up and then filled a garbage can out in the hall next to the supply shelf, doused it in lighter fluid, lit a cigarette and dropped it inside instantly starting a fire that was throwing out smoke that was filling the hall but he had also disabled the smoke detector out there so that it wouldn't give it away too early, but what he found inside his boss's office was only adding to their trouble. Having decorated his face Michael was looking at himself in his mirror and laughing at himself in trying to recite things in a horrible accent.

Charles came back having found his wallet and went by Erin's desk. She rose up and said, "Hi, Charles!" rather loudly so that Michael and Dwight could hear her and making the intended victim pause in his steps. That was their cue. Slowly, silently, Michael's office door opened wide enough for two figures to emerge. Neither Pam nor Jim saw them as they carried on with their calls as Erin replied, "How do you heat these things?" holding up the MRE and stalling for time. Encroaching on Charles from behind they raised up their right hands brandishing large knives. Their faces were horrendous, resembling Heath Ledger's Joker with long, twisted red smiles and sloppily applied white paint to their skin and on their heads were white towels pilfered from the women's bathroom. At the last moment they came screaming, "Die! Die!" in boisterous, high pitched voices and lunged right for Charles whom immediately balled his right fist, turned, and slugged the tall attacker before him in his left cheek. This attacker staggered and yelped in pain as his partner, a shorter man wearing a white button up shirt, froze in place allowing Charles to deliver a foot right to the man's crouch. Both men were still standing so Charles delivered a rabbit punch to the tall with a dirty yellow shirt's kidneys then wrapped one hand around the knife hand and wretched the weapon away with the other then stepped in between the attacker's feet and hip tossed him on the floor behind Pam who stood up and recoiled in horror. But it still wasn't over. The shorter attacker tried to right himself, crying in agony as he staggered over to Jim's desk, but still had the knife in hand and Charles planted his right foot into the man's back, sprawling him out on Jim's desk then he rolled onto the floor knocking the wind out of him as the knife was wrestled away from him.

"Stop!" Jim called out pulling Charles away, "Stop! That's enough."

Both of the attackers lay on the floor, not moving and only giving out light whimpers. It was over in mere seconds as Charles was gently pushed over to Erin's desk by Jim who then hovered over the short attacker. There was stunned silence in the office as Jim knelt down and ripped off the towel of the short attacker at his feet. "Michael?!" Jim gasped. Pam approached the taller attacker and ripped off his cover. "Dwight?!" she yelled.

Jim turned to Erin who was standing up petrified with wide eyes and a pale complexion having dropped her phone and forgot what her purpose was still. No one suspected she was part of this plan; instead she was like them; surprised and stunned. "Erin. Call an ambulance." Jim said. Shaking herself back to reality Erin nodded and picked up the receiver before her wide eyes flicked towards Andy's desk and she saw smoke billowing up from underneath the door. Pointing and dropping the receiver she exclaimed, "Oh my God! Oh my God!"

Everyone turned and saw the smoke billowing up from underneath the door. Stanley yelled, "Fire!" and Charles went for the front door, ran the back of his hand against the door's face, felt it was cool, opened It to a empty hallway, "Let's go! Everyone! Use the stairs and get out!" standing to the side. There was a shoving match as everyone ran out the door, stepping over Dwight and Michael. Phyllis got to the door first but stopped, "I got to get my purse!"

"Leave it, woman!" Stanley snapped trying to shove his way through. The only one that did not was Angela whom pushed Pam out of the way to get to her cubicle and opened a drawer of the filing cabinet behind her desk and took out from the bed inside was her cat Bandit then took off running, stepping over everyone without so much as pausing. Jim had tried to pick up Michael but he was a wet noodle and Pam was trying to wake up Dwight. Erin was still there not sure what to do. Smoke was filling up the room quickly. Jim said, "Okay, I'm not dying here," wanting to leave immediately with the belief that the whole building was catching on fire, "But, we can't leave them," as he tried to heft Michael up by thrusting his hands under his boss's armpits as Pam tried to drag Dwight by his ankles, but her petite frame was not enough as make Dwight's body budge.

Charles went over to Dwight's head and pointed to Pam, "Grab his feet. We'll carry him out."

Nodding Jim shouted to Erin, "Grab Michael's feet."

Bounding over-the receptionist did what she was told and the four of them carried the two men out. It was a real test of endurance as they had to pause every so often to adjust for the weight and not being well built they had to stop frequently to get the aching out of their muscles. By now the fire alarm was activated and the overhead sprinklers were activated dousing the interior of the hallway and the office in water, but they managed to get Michael and Dwight out into the parking lot and laid them out on the sidewalk before the front door as Hank opened and locked the front door, the elevators and the stairs beside them. A fire truck and ambulance arrived on the scene soon afterwards. Doused in water and her blood pumping Pam walked away trying to catch her breath. Jim came and wrapped a arm around her shoulder, "You okay?"

She nodded before wiping the tears from her eyes, her body was shivering.

"Okay. I'm going to get a head count. I'll be right back."

Stanley was sitting on the curb near Michael breathing hard. Phyllis was right beside him. All the excitement was making his heart hurt but Phyllis kept talking to him softly to get him to calm down as Angela sat inside her car with Bandit listening to children's music as she whispered into the feline's ear.

He had to do it. He didn't want anyone else being left up there. The last two to come out were Toby and Kelly because they worked in the annex. Now the rest of the people that occupied the office park; the dock workers, Vance Refrigeration and three other small companies all were soaked in water and bitterly cursing and wanting to know what caused this at the same time a fire engine and a ambulance rolled into the parking lot.

Everyone watched as Dwight and Michael were taken away by EMS with Kelly clutching onto Ryan's sleeve, whispering to him about something and Toby stared with his hands in his pant pockets and a thin smile on his sad face as he watched Michael being taking away as he knew that he was going to be part of the investigation as human resources representative. With both men out of the picture for a while Jim placed in de facto charge of the office and the first item he had to do was contact David Wallace in New York.

_Erin: (still outside as the scene is secured and still scared and trembling as the adrenalin started to wear off) Jim is on the phone with David Wallace and is telling him what happened. (She starts nervously pulling on her fingers.) I hope they don't find out I was part of it. I don't want to get fired. (Her eyes were wide and full of dread. The camera crew couldn't get close enough to Jim as he walks away from the others with his cell phone trying to explain, however the cameraman gets closer as Jim, one hand over the opposite ear to block out the extra noise and they could hear David shout, "He did WHAT?!")_

A week later:

The office is relatively quiet. Because of the sprinkler system a lot of things had to be replaced. The carpeting for one as well as a lot of the paperwork however the copier managed to survive. They were given three days off so that the office could be fixed and they were back to work even Erin who was still frightened that she would be fired. She still had the MRE beside her computer waiting for Charles to come back to show her how to use it.

_Jim: (sitting in the conference room with his back to the window overlooking the parking lot) Dwight and Michael are in the hospital and immediately afterwards they are going to New York to speak with David Wallace and corporate over what happened. So, right now, I'm in charge and with those two of the picture our productivity has actually gone up 50% though what happened is tragic I still don't understand what those two were thinking, (shrugging his shoulders and scoffing) I mean…you know what; I don't want to know what they're thinking._

_Toby: (at his office desk) After the incident I had to put Charles on suspension pending an investigation, but the board is determining that it was self-defense, so, he'll still get paid. On the other hand Michael and Dwight are just getting out of the hospital. (He pulls out a piece of folded paper and holds it up to the camera) Right here is the hospital's report on the injuries they sustained. (he then turns it around he could read it but not aloud but merely savoring this for himself and chuckles a bit then realizing he was still on camera he quickly pockets the paper and clears his throat and puts a serious tone in his voice) I have to go to New York to be part of the investigation. (His smile returns)_

_Kevin: (his voice is surprisingly serious in tone) I'm the only one in this office that is upset over what has happened. The vending machines were destroyed in the fire because of flooding caused by the water and the firefighters and all the snacks that were in there were destroyed. All those snacks were made by hard working people with the sole purpose of being eaten by us and now they've been destroyed before they could fulfill their purpose. (The camera cuts to Kevin sullenly in the break room with one hand held up to the broken vending machine. The plastic face had been broken and inside were still the rotting contents because the vending machine people had not come by yet to replace them) All of their lives were take too soon._

_Angela: I was scared but we made it out okay. (cuddles with Bandit). I don't care what happens to Michael. He put Bandit in danger._

In New York David Wallace, the company CFO and a Head Corporate HR rep Kendall were sitting inside a large conference room on one side of a large, oval oak table. In came a still Dwight leading the way with his usual dirty yellow button up shirt with a red and green striped sequence tie on a dark background with a bandage on his left cheek and another wrapped around his forehead. He held the door open for Michael who also had a bandage on his forehead. He tried to close it and lock out Toby but the HR rep put his shoulder to the door and forced his way in. The three of them had to ride together all the way from Scranton to New York, although Toby was almost left behind at the office. Michael was using his car and tried to leave him behind, but Erin called him back saying that they needed to have Toby with them when speaking with David Wallace.

At the head of the table Charles was sitting rather casually with a pad of paper in front of him and a pen in his left hand. Michael approached Charles to try and speak with him but Charles turned away in his seat.

As soon as the three were seated David shouted, "How could you possibly think this was a good idea?"

His hands resting on the table Dwight replied, "A lot of ideas were not appreciated in their time."

"Electricity" Michael said.

"Shampoo" Dwight tacked on.

David continued with anger in his voice trying to avoid exploding into rage, "You could have burned down the whole building! You attacked a man with knives dressed up like Iraqi insurgents?! What was that for?"

Dwight kept his cool saying, "I just want to say, for the record, I did not attack anybody. Charles attacked me."

Kendall was going through a small stack of paper that had the witness statements gathered up and typed by Toby. He read, "Did you shout 'Die. Die!"

"Yes, I shouted 'die'" Dwight chuckled because it was amusing, "I shouted many things. I was also going to shout instructions on how to get out of the building so you can imagine my frustration, as safety officer because more people could have died because I was knocked out-because no one would take heed…"

Michael interrupted trying to improperly correct Dwight's grammar, "Heeded."

Continuing on Dwight changed his words, "heeded. No. Take heed of-heeded of…no one would take _headed_ of my instructions."

All of this was both confusing and frustrating with Kendall staring at these two wondering how on earth they were put in charge of people as David sat next to him, rigid in his seat, looking down with a headache. There was a tense silence in the room that was finally broken when Michael rapped his knuckles on the table and rose up saying, "Okay," then letting out a sigh to clear his mind and walking around Charles to stand before the large, open, windows that looked out onto the city. He paused deliberately staring at the skyscrapers, "Ah, the city…." he didn't continue with that sentence leaving everyone to wonder just what he was doing. Instead of continuing with this Michael put his hands into his pockets, turned, and came back to the table to a empty seat right next to Kendall, "Dwight, we're not mad-we're just disappointed." Trying to brush off everything from his shoulders. He felt that the most serious charge was the fire and that was done by Dwight.

"No!" David barks, "We are _mad_!"

"Yes" Michael whispered looking at the CFO then back at Dwight, "We are. Very livid, but we're going to let this one slide."

"No!" David interrupted, "We're NOT!"

Lightly shaking his head Michael casually replied, "I am not a mind reader, David."

Frustrated David said, "Look. This is a very serious offense. We have cause to fire both of you."

But Michael wasn't paying attention. Instead he was asking Kendall, "Could you shove down?" who surprisingly does so. Sitting down in a new chair, clasping his hands together Michael carried on as though he didn't hear David, "Instead! Shove down, please," turning to Kendall again wanting some more room. "Instead, what I think we should do is strip you of your title as safety officer."

Dwight's eyes opened, his jaw becomes slack, "No, please..." he coveted the title.

"And we should take a part of his pay and donate it to a charity of your choice" quickly pointing at Charles, "Something that Dwight doesn't like."

"PETA" Dwight nodded. He liked the idea better than being fired.

However David was having none of this, "Michael, you have to take responsibility here. People could have died because of the way your allowing your office to run. Do you want that on your conscious?"

Instead of answering Michael turned his head towards his cohort Dwight and asked, "Do you?" as if projecting the question onto him.

"Michael?" David called out.

The regional manager turns his head back to the CFO and replies in a surprised whisper, "You talking to me?"

"Yeah!"

His wide eyes looked over to David then over at Dwight who is looking back at him because the question was directed at the regional manager and Michael was confused, "What?"

His blood pressure rising David raised his voice to try and get his point across at this clueless man, "Michael. This is unacceptable! Totally unacceptable!"

"David. I understand you're upset but there's no need to be. I'm on my way to a quick and successful recovery," Michael replied albeit with a slight lisp in his voice because of the bandages around his face. His hand lost two teeth and suffered a concussion in the scuffle.

"That's not what I meant," David continued, "I meant, what on earth were you guys thinking of doing? Why did you attack Charles in the first place?"

"Again. He attacked us" Dwight tried to clarify, "and the fire was part of my safety lecture so we could nail two birds with one stone."

Holding up a hand to his cohort Michael stepped in, "It was part of our-my-therapy" so he could claim the glory for himself.

Canting his head slightly to the side David shook his head ever so slightly in confusion, "Therapy?"

"Yes," Michael nodded, "It was part of our exposure therapy to help Charles with his problems."

"What problems?"

"He is a danger to our office…" Michael said actually believing this and pointed with his left hand towards the 'culprit' who was now writing on his pad of paper not caring what any of them were saying.

David holds up a hand to silence Michael, "What the hell are you talking about? 'Danger?' Did Charles make any threats against you or anybody in your office? He had only been at your office for less than a day," tapping a finger on the surface of the desk.

"He did attack _us_" Dwight replied. The bandages were his proof of this, "I'll admit, though, he did surprisingly well," nodding. He was impressed that he was taken down by this smaller man.

"That's because you provoked him!" David shouted. These two had pulled some twisted stuff before but this was well beyond anything previous but David didn't understand why this had to happen.

"We did _not_ provoke him, David" Michael said slowly bringing his hands together on the table surface and interlocking the fingers, "We were merely trying to help exercise the deadly spirits out of him."

David shook his head trying to understand what was being said, "What? W-what are you talking about?" slumping into his chair. Then, the idea dawns on him, "You think that he'll snap and kill everyone in his office because of a sick stereotype of veterans? He's a veteran. So what?"

"So what?" giving a light mocking, "You say it as though it's not important. Well, obviously did think it was important to be a veteran because you hired him as part of the program, right?" He was trying to turn it around and put blame right on David and corporate but it wasn't working.

"Michael!" David roared, "Tell me where did you think that Charles was going to kill everyone at the office?"

Michael did not want to admit to it so he kept his mouth shut but his eyes nervously looked at David then towards the camera then around the room aimlessly trying to find an elusive answer. Toby leans forward and whispers to Michael, "You might want to answer him." Shaking his head Michael sighs and comes up with a way to escape from this other than running out of the room, "Okay, how about this; we just shake hands and pretend this never happened. Live and let live?" clapping his hands onto the table.

"No!" David scoffed bitterly. "You brought weapons to your office. You attacked a man for no reason! You started a fire that caused thousands of dollars in damage. We had to replace the carpet, several computers, and lost tons of client's files because your stupidity!" stabbing a straight finger right at Michael who nervously scoffed at this.

"Okay, whoa. Easy, David. My knife was fake. Okay? It was plastic. Even fooled you" quickly pointing back at the CFO and letting out a satisfied giggle before clearing his throat, "There was reason" Michael said emphasizing 'reason'. I can't be held accountable because my actions were pure."

_Dwight: My knife wasn't fake._

Kendall took out a ball point pen from his inside jacket pocket and put the tip against the paper, "Michael, for the record, just what exactly were _your 'intentions.' _His and Dwight's statements on the matter had not been made yet because in the hospital Michael refused to talk to Toby and Dwight followed his orders to also refuse to give a statement.

All the eager to reply to this, in his own words, Michael pulled his lips back in a wide smile, with Dwight nodding his head with him, "I was going to conduct exposure therapy. If this didn't work we would try something_-bigger-_until Charles felt safe to be around the dangers and work in the office."

"Like what?" Kendall asked still writing.

Dwight answered, "Me and my cousin Mose was going to dress as insurgents and kidnap Meredith…."

David and the lawyer gasped at this as Michael waved a hand and hissed "Shut it. Shut it!" Casting his eyes around the table Charles was now leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed loosely at his stomach, looking straight at the regional manager with an unblinking, cold, leer that scared Michael so he turned his head to avoid making eye contact. "But, yes…" beginning again slowly, "we would try something else-something _bigger. _I am qualified for these sorts of things_._"

"Do you have a medical degree, Michael?" Kendall enquired.

"N-no"

"Do you practice medicine?"

"No."

"Do you have any training in psychiatry or psychology? Are you a social worker?" Stammering in his answer the lawyer tapped the table with the top of his pen, "Are you any of those?"

"N-no. Not really. I don't have…the paper…in my hands…" turning the palms of his hands up showing them to be empty.

"Then how are you qualified for any sort of therapy, Michael?" David asked.

"I got everything on WebMD! The best answers for everything medical related" Michael replied with a smile, flicking his eyes towards the camera then back at David and the lawyer were not amused the slightest. Shaking his head then taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes with the thumb and index finger David sighed in frustration. After the incident he had to stay away for two days straight trying to get everything back together. The company was out nearly $50,000 because of these two for damages, lost wages and lost clients. There seemed to be no hammering in the point that what they did was gross negligence and stupid on both their parts and they expected to get away with little or no punishment. Putting his glasses back on the bridge of his nose David clasped his hands together. "Mister McMillan. You've been quiet this whole time. Do you have any to say?"

"Yeah, like 'thank you'?" Michael looked at the younger man.

Dropping his pen onto the paper Charles said, "I don't know what these two jackasses were thinking but I did nothing to deserve this. I have said nothing threatening or anything like that to anyone. The only things I have done were say 'Hi' to everyone, turning in my papers to the accountants, delivering some packages to the post office and giving a spare MRE to Erin, the receptionist."

"A MRE?" David asked.

"Meals Ready to Eat" Charles replied, "Military food." His dark eyes look over at Michael who had a cold chill up his spine and went back on topic, "why did you think I needed exposure therapy? Answer me that."

"Well…" Michael began but his voice dropped into a whisper, mumbling the rest of his sentence so that no one could hear it.

"Hey" wrapping his knuckles on the table Charles said, "Hey. Answer the question," not raising his voice as much as he wanted to. He wanted to shout and slap this man because of his stupidity and insults.

"It was all Toby's idea!" Michael cracked and pointed over at the HR rep. "He's the one that did it. We didn't want to get involved."

Toby looked at everyone's faces then at the camera utterly perplexed.

_Jim: (Back at the Scranton branch) Well, David Wallace called me and said that Michael and Dwight have both been suspended-without pay-for a month. He said that Charles wanted them both to be fired but corporate decided to go with this. Also, when they get back they have to sit down with Toby for thirty hours of consoling and formerly apologize to Charles and neither of them are allowed to go back to their jobs until all three are done and until then….I'm in charge. (Slowly letting out his lungs and he stares at the camera with eyes filled with worry.)_


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters to The Office. They are owned by MSNBC, but I do own Charles. He is my creation. The italics means 'talking head interviews'.

At the Scranton branch it is very peaceful. Stanley and Phyllis were at their desks, their attention devoted to their sales. Next to them Jim was sitting at his desk rather bored. He had finished all of his sales and his eyes traversed from Pam to his right and then to the left, to Dwight's empty desk.

_Jim: Dwight and Michael were suspended, without pay, for their 'little joke' against Charles. It's been three days and without Dwight here…I don't have any real motivation to do anything. I mean, 90% of everything I do here is thinking of and doing pranks on Dwight the other 5% is talking to Pam and the other 5% is actually doing sales, which I rounded up to the nearest whole number. So, with Dwight gone I don't know who else to prank. Pam? Can't really do that because, well, I have to sleep sometime. Charles? I've seen what happens when he's surprised and I don't want that happening to me. (He feels a cold shiver run up his spine.)_

Ever since the incident Charles has been rather quiet. He came back from the deposition and didn't talk about it. Jim didn't know anything about it until David Wallace called informing him of their decision as well as telling Jim that he was now in charge of the branch for the time being.

_Jim: David Wallace said that at first they were going to have Michael and Dwight apologize to Charles, but, somehow Charles found a whole list of all the things that Dwight and Michael have done in the office and said he wanted them fired or suspended. They settled for suspended. But I was also told that Michael and Dwight did their little stunt because they were trying to 'cure' Charles. (He looks at the camera crew with a slightly furrowed eyebrow and bit on his lower lip._

Pam rattles on her computer a few times before she feels that Jim is looking at her. She lifts up her head and smiles at him before casting her eyes over at Dwight's empty desk and there is a look of sadness. She looks up at the wall clock behind Stanley's desk. It was nearly noon and that means lunch.

Jim slowly stood up from his desk and heads towards the break room, but a few steps he breaks his path and heads into the empty conference room's window overlooking the parking lot. He parts the blinds with his fingers and looks down to see Michael's car in his marked parking spot and sees the regional manager, briefcase in hand as though he's coming into work. He enters the front door where Hank, the security guard, who rises behind his desk as Michael enters the door and tries to make his way quickly to the elevator.

"Hold it, Michael" Hank says moving between Michael and the elevator. "You're suspended. You're not supposed to be here."

Michael stops and sighs in frustration, "Look, Hank, I'm just here to go to my office…"

Hank cuts him off, "You're suspended. You know what your corporate branch said; you're not supposed to be here until your suspension is up. Failure to do so will result in your termination." Hank was being stern, but not threatening. He didn't really like Michael and he didn't really like the job either, but being able to get people to leave did have its perks. Michael sighed and tried to say something else but Hank took one step towards him and pointed towards the door, "Out!"

Sulking out the door Michael heads towards his car, throws in his briefcase and leaves. Upstairs Jim lightly shakes his head and looks at the camera. "He's been doing this ever since he was suspended, right on time every day." He then chuckles, "He does realize there are other doors to get into this place, right?"

With Michael out of the picture Jim was now in charge of the branch. So far everything was running smoothly, productivity was up, so was revenue, and so was morale because Michael was not distracting them. Even Stanley seemed a bit better, albeit a bit, because his checks were a bit bigger than they normally were because he could focus on his sales more.

In his little corner Charles was sitting at his desk, headphones on to music as he worked on his computer. He had just been on the job for less than a week and already he had two people suspended, but he was actually thanked by the others, mainly Stanley and Phyllis, however Kelly couldn't keep her mouth quiet about it, sending up a string of Facebook updates putting the whole episode entirely out of context because she didn't actually witness the event, she only saw Michael and Dwight being laid out in front of the building after the fire alarm went off. She described it as "THE most awesome thing I've ever seen. He kicked their butts," then pleaded with Ryan to start taking karate lessons so she could dress in hot dresses and go to bars where men would try to have their way with her and Ryan could kick their asses.

Angela was not pleased about having Dwight gone, despite all of their past tensions, but she was too afraid to stand up to Charles after seeing what he can do to two grown men. He didn't speak to her at all but he had a rather cold persona, never smiled or laughed, rarely talked and that was usually with Jim or Erin. The rest of the time he just went to his desk and stayed there until lunch then he would leave the office and come back afterwards and stayed there until five and then he was gone, like everyone else. However, Angela was by no means idle. She would send Dwight 'updates' as he was living out his time on his farm.

Going to Shrute Farms Dwight was sitting on a handmade rocking chair gently leaning back with and feeling the warm rays of the sun falling upon him.

_Dwight: I've been rather enjoying my time off. Truth is; this time off has allowed Mose and I to catch up on a lot of our past projects that we haven't got around to doing. We got rid of the bats from the barn loft and harvested our hemp and sold. Even though I don't have a job right now, I got more money from that harvest of hemp than I would have being at the office._

About that time his phone vibrates. Taking it out from his pocket he reads the scene and a subtle smile appears on his lips before he quickly pockets his phone.

At the office Erin receives a phone call and lets out a sigh knowing who it was. She answers, "Dunder Mifflin. This is Erin."

"Hey, Erin. It's Michael…"

"I know" she sighs.

This was part of the ritual. He would call every hour to get the latest updates of the office, but after only a few calls there was nothing new to tell him and Erin didn't know what to say. She couldn't make anything up because she was afraid of being fired until Jim heard Erin sigh and rose from his desk, seeing a chance for one good prank.


End file.
